Lately, it's rare when someone refers to me as “Young Man”, and isn't being sarcastic. I'm an old Rock N' Roll Baby Boomer younger than David Letterman, and older than Jay Leno. This past weekend I was sitting on the dock, at our deep water access condo, fishing. It was a lazy Savannah Sunday afternoon, as I watched my cork bobbing in the brackish Hoover Creek waters.
From behind I heard a voice, “Young man, could you use some company?”
I turned around to face a gentleman from my parent's “Greatest Generation!” Before I could say a word he'd sat down on the dock and was already baiting his hook. “You like Country Music young fella?”
Turning toward him, he didn't give me a chance to answer, “By Country I don't mean that stuff that comes out of Nashville today!”
This old boy was a multi-tasker like no one I'd ever seen, he'd opened a beer, poured a drop on his live bait, cast his line and turned on a mini boom box playing a Hank William's CD. I'm talking Hank Senior, not Bosephus! Across the water the classic Hill Billy anthem echoed “Hey Good Lookin', What you got Cookin'.....?”
All of a sudden, mind you I haven't said a word, the old timer yelled “Hey boy, look at that, see him? Is that the biggest Sea Trout you ever seen? I call him Sam. Been tryin' to catch him for weeks. Come on now, oh dad gum it, he cleaned my hook!”
Before he baited his hook again, and opened his second cold beer, I spoke my first words and introduced myself. As he put another live shrimp on the hook, he told me that he'd learned to soak his bait with beer from an old World War II buddy of his. “Drives the fish crazy, especially old Sam!”
I told him my Father had served in the War in Germany. As he cast again he said, “So your Daddy was in that one too huh. I was Navy in the South Pacific.”
Henry, as I'd learned his name was, took another swig of beer and got another hit on his line! “Come on now Sam, come to Papa!” The old Sea Trout took the bait again.
For the third time the old man tried to catch the trout. He baited the hook and really soaked the shrimp with beer this time! Again the old trout took the old man's bait and left the hook shining.
Hank William's “Your Cheatin' Heart” started to play as I saw my cork bob a little. I jerked on the line and brought up a fish so small, well it was embarrassing. Henry quickly said “Can I use that thing as bait?”
The old guy tried to pay me with one of his Pabst Blue Ribbons. Before I could decline he soaked the little fish with what he'd just offered me. He cast the line and immediately got a hit. I could see the big Sea Trout going for it. All of a sudden he'd taken the bait and was jumping all around in the water. Next thing I knew, the trout jumped out of the water and was flopping around on the dock. What luck!
Old Henry picked the fish up and started to throw him back in the water.
“Mr Henry, what are you doing? You worked so hard for that catch. That's a good sized Sea Trout!”
He finished tossing the fish back, “Naw, it wouldn't be sporting! He does that every time after his fourth beer.! See ya' next Sunday Sam!”
2/15/10
We are fast approaching baseball season and this ol' Georgia boy is ready to put on my favorite National League team colors. And, yes, my team plays at Turner Field, but not as the home team.
It all started three years ago when as a wonderful Father's Day gift, my two sons flew their current and final Step Mom, Dianne, and me up for a week long visit to Chicago. My oldest boy, Paul, is a successful professional gym coach. He and his wife, Jenny, and my two beautiful Grand kids, live in suburban Plainfield. “Small Paul”, as I used to call him, now owns the gym!
My youngest, Dan, moved to the great Windy City after graduating from FSU. In '07 he was working on his PhD in Psychology at the University of Illinois, Chicago. He and his lady, Angela, lived less than a mile from Wrigley Field! They are still together in Baltimore, where Dr. Dan, is still, like his Daddy and big brother, a Cub's fan!
For the first three days we did all of the typical tourist stuff. We saw Millennium Park, the world famous Navy Pier, the splendor of Lake Shore drive, where we tried to figure out which top floor penthouse condo Oprah lived in. And at my request, we had lunch at the Cubs' legendary Hall of Fame announcer, Harry Caray's Italian Steakhouse. It was there that my sons pulled out tickets to the next days Cubs game. Wrigley Field, here we come!
The Cubs were taking on the Arizona Diamondbacks at 1:20. The “girls” all decided to get some shopping in, while the three of us headed to the ballpark. Paul and I parked right in front of Dan's apartment. He commented that he couldn't believe we got a space on game day. I kind of shook my head, “Son, it's 10:15 in the morning. Game time's not for three more hours!”
Paul pointed across the street to a sign that read “Cubs parking full!” He explained “Dad, forget everything you ever associated with Major League Baseball from going to Braves games. There you pull off I-75, get a parking place, watch the game, then get back on the Interstate to go home. Most of the die hard Cubs fans are already in one of the many bars we'll pass along the way. A Cubs game is more like a Southern college football game!”
Old Dad was finally starting to get it! I took off my seat belt and opened the door to my son's mini van and said, “Well son, why don't we get your little brother and go join the natives. How 'bout them Cubs anyway!”
At 10:45 I was enjoying my first ever tomato topped hot dog and an Old Style Beer. I knew my personal hero, Jimmy Buffett, would assure me “It's 5:45 Somewhere!” How 'bout them Cubs indeed.
Wrigley Field is awesome. It's in a wondrous time warp. If you were shown a black and white snapshot, from the game I watched July 21st, 2007, it would be hard to know if it were taken in 1957, 1977, last year or last week. Look at the scoreboard and you'll see a hand reach out and change the numbers. Across the street from the hallowed ball field, are people sitting on bleachers, on top of homes and apartment buildings. How bout them Cubs doesn't do them justice.
In the 7th inning stretch we all sang Take Me Out to the Ballgame. The fans were great and filled with passion. We, I mean the Cubs lost 3 to 1 to the Diamondbacks. A couple of “wait til next years” have passed and maybe 2010 will be the year! If that happens for the first time in 102 years, my heart will be on aisle 424, row 9, seat 105, celebrating with the rest of Wrigleyville! “Buy me some peanuts and Crackerjacks, I don't care if I ever come back! HOLY COW!”
1/7/10
Health foods, the rules have changed thank goodness
So did you hear the one about the middle aged guy who says to his wife? “Honey have you seen my aspirin? You know the doctor told me to take one a day to prevent heart problems?”
“Don't worry dear, I put an extra tablespoon of mayonnaise in your tuna salad, you'll be just fine!”
Now for a little warm weather humor in January, The teenage girl asks, “Mom where is the sun screen? I'm going down to the pool.”
“Don't worry Sweetie, just finish your cup of cocoa and you'll be good for an hour or so!”
OK, don't try the following health regime at home before, as they say on TV, checking with your Doctor first. Hellmann's has a mayonnaise made with “the goodness of Canola Oil” that actually promotes cardiovascular health. It is high in Omega 6 and Omega 3 essential oils for “good heart health!” I put some of that stuff on a hamburger and it was delicious. It tasted like it was bad for me. That's OK I can still feel guilty about the fried ground chuck it was on. You have to take this health food thing, one step at a time.
Research shows that women who drink cocoa are much less likely to get sunburned than women who don't. It protects you against the Sun's UV rays. Properties in tomatoes and Salmon and other fatty fish high in Omega 3 also keep you from getting red. Throw a little Canola mayo on that dish, and you can be protected all day, and have a healthy heart.
Finally some good news for chocolate lovers! Dark Chocolate lowers blood pressure. I never thought I'd be a big fan of health food, but that's all changed. If only adult beverages were good for me!
Believe it or not the antioxidants in Cold Beer, Red Wine and even some Chardonnays fight cancer, heart disease, diabetes and even cataracts. Happy Hour is a lot more fun than laser surgery. My dad gum In laws down in Jacksonville are going to live forever, with perfect eye sight!
I hope this little blog about nutrition helped in planning your family meals. Oh, since I have told you what is good for you that you thought wasn't, here is the flip side of that coin. New research ties tofu with thyroid dysfunction. I don't know, maybe a little extra mayo on that fake sausage or wiener will make it alright. But check with your doctor first. Bon Appetit and Cheers!
Paul Sebastian Blog October 10, 09
This morning I opened my e-mail and saw that I had 14 new messages. All but one was from a well meaning, good friend, who I have diagnosed as a “Mass Forwarder!” Or maybe he's just a “Serial E-mailer!”
I have no close friends named Keith, so for the sake of anonymity, that's what we'll call him. I never receive one e-mail from “Keith”, he waits till he has at least 6 things to send me and the other people in his 20 person “must forward group!” He takes the time to customize each one with a personal heading like “you won't believe this”, “this is true”, “this is a keeper” and my all time favorite “don't break the chain!” This is the one where failing to forward the message means I don't support the troops, I think John Wayne was a bad actor and I've got a big curse coming!
You know, If I had saved a tenth of my friend's e-mails, I could publish a complete book on stupid Urban Legends. No matter what “Keith” gets in his e-mail, I get an instant copy of it! I have to admit I spent one fearful day, filling my car up last January, checking to make sure there was no disease tainted hypodermic needle stuck on my pump nozzle! “Seek immediate medical help, if you inadvertently become inoculated!”
Snopes.com separates fact from fiction, and discloses to the world when a story is true or is an Urban Legend! I sent “Keith” a link to this website and he immediately downloaded 6 of their bogus stories and e-mailed them to me saying “Thanks Paul, this site is great!” Let me stress, if he couldn't have found at least 6 stories, he wouldn't have bothered forwarding them to me, and his other 19 dad gum friends! Not to mention the fact that clearly, none of this stuff was true!
The man will forward anything, I mean anything! The other day he sent a note attached to an obvious spam that said “Don't know if you need to use this stuff yet, but this is a good price! I did hear it causes blurred vision, but the price is right, and it might make the little woman happy!” This broken English spam asked for my credit card number and guaranteed 2 day delivery! I can't wait to ask my doctor, if being an idiot is right for me!
And the “little woman” would be a lot happier if I wasn't spending half an hour a day going through “Keith's” e-mail,
PAUL SEBASTIAN BLOG 8/18
You know it seems that the comics in the paper just aren’t as funny as they were when I was a kid.Of course today’s young folks don’t even know what the funny papers are.I said something about Dilbert the other day and my ten year old Grandson, Tanner, asked “What web site is that on Pop?”
One of my favorite comics growing up was Blondie.For some reason seeing Dagwood collide with the Mail Man once or twice a week, seemed a lot funnier then, than it does now
Don't know about you, but I never have had my mail delivered at 8 in the Morning,If that had been the case, I might have had as many collisions as ol’ Dagwood.
Now I admit, I still get a kick out of the aforementioned Dilbert, which wasn't around in my younger days, so that brilliant strip is exempt from my critique of the classics.
Also exempt is the Legendary Peanuts, which is timeless and will always be in permanent re runs.
Imagine if all you had to do in your eight hour a day job was draw a couple of frames, and come up with a funny punchline.“Hmmm, should it be Sarge beating Beetle to a pulp, or a General Halftrack golf joke?”“Should Andy Capp be coming up with an excuse for coming in late from the pub with Chalkie, or should Andy be “Mr. Competitive” in a not so friendly game of Soccer?”
Enough on the not so funny papers!I'll close by saying “Goodnight Charlie Brown,wherever you are!”
7/6/09
My wife, Dianne, is the first person to steer me away from high fructose corn syrup.The alternative to making everything this stuff is in, is good old fashioned sugar.It's probably more expensive to sweeten things with sugar, and it's been known to give you cavities and expand your waste line, but at least it ain't got MERCURY in it!
See, the process used to make high fructose corn syrup can cause traces ofmercury to seep into whatever is being made.We're talking candy, cookies, soft drinks, yogurt etc. and I do mean etc.
It's in foods you don't even think of needing to be sweetened, like bread.If you can find a brand of hamburger buns that doesn't contain high fructose corn syrup, please email me and let me know what it is.And while you're at it, try finding a brand of ketchup that doesn't use it!
In the Super Market today, high fructose corn syrup was even listed on their fresh made sushi!Why would you ever think of sweetening something that's gonna get dunked in soy sauce?Never understood that whole raw fish thing anyway.And y'all better have been telling me the truth about California Rolls being fully cooked!
You know across America as well as here in Savannah, schools have been shut down because a little mercury got loose.Maybe in the fall they aught to check their cafeteria!
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